Ladies, this might be the most unpopular thing I have ever written. But, I can honestly say that I have never felt that being a woman has prevented me from getting ahead. In fact, I think many times my gender has been an asset.
I often find when I’m struggling with a problem, I circle around a set of potential solutions that seems to magnify the problem itself. Now that’s a problem. This week, after a restless night, I thought there must be a better way to deal with life’s inevitable conflicts. The following morning, I came across an article by Dr. Sanjay Gupta, Chief Medical Correspondent.
Have you ever noticed that the advice we often give others is the advice we need to take? Such was the case last week when I was taking an early morning jog through a remote park in West Los Angeles.
On my run, I crossed though a basketball court where a celebrity rapper was working out with his personal trainer. The trainer was encouraging him to do a few push-ups while the rapper resisted. Hearing their playful banter, I looked over and chimed in. “Even I can do a pushup” I said in that girl-power kind of way. That’s when it hit me. “Bam!”
“I’m not really controlling. I just like everything done my way.”
Letting go of control is a daily effort. It requires us to relinquish our small agenda. It asks us each day to seek quiet, go inside, and steady the belief that if we let go of what we think is best, something better has the chance to emerge.
Agreements are based on our behavior, not our words. Scary thought isn’t it? We can tell somebody we will no longer stay late at the office, pick up after their dirty dishes, or bail them out of debt one more time. Yet, if our behavior does not change, our words will mean nothing. Our credibility is compromised and we inevitably end up getting everything we tolerate.